Hi for all my readers. Lately things been really high for me to face on. November seems like bad month for me. I've been crying for liters of tears and been living in misery. How can love done me a cruel thing to lay on? Who can I shot a look and blame to? How can I sit for SPM calmly? To you,my hero,I felt a deep love inside of me towards you and a big hope for being together and having fun like yesterday are all my secret wishes and have been unveiled now. I'm tired and felt totally fucked up! I've almost trying to let myself curl on the bed even on the SPM days. I don't have strength even to hold the pens and flip the pages while my mind is somewhere else. Maybe my mind travel in the past when we were having good times,and your sweet words kept crossing my mind. Eventually? I pull my throw on and curl and cry and sleep and wake up and eat and sleep and finally thats my regime. I hold back my tears,blink it back whenever I saw your face and eventually they burst and I bury my face on your chest. I felt calm for a while but when you walk away,I felt lost.
It's December now. Everything is better but still,I'm afraid about us. You and me. Can you still hold your love towards me like yesterday? Do you love me stronger than yesterday? Baby you have the answer. You treat me more than a princess should have and I feel bless and grateful for it. I will always lift my hands and pray to Allah,may He gives us strength to stay in this romance forever and let us be husband and wife someday. Amin
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